Hello All, and welcome to the next installment of Making my Mark on the world. In this post, I talk about some of what I have been up to in the past week and a half. I also discuss the emotional toll that I have felt.
It has been awhile since I have last posted; this is because it has been an interesting week. A lot of emotions have come up for me. As I mentioned in my previous post, I have returned to scooping. It is physically taxing. My fingertips are burnt from touching hot waffle cones and my forearms/shoulders are sore. Waffle cones and ice cream are delicious though, so I can completely understand the demand for them. With that being said, I am still feeling a lack of fulfillment in my current position. I have spent hours prepping for and applying to a couple of positions that feel aligned to me. Quality over quantity. My life coach has provided tremendous assistance in completing these applications.
One of those positions was the academic advisor position. I felt that my interview went pretty well. However, I also felt that I did not necessarily sell myself enough. This has always been a struggle for me. It is also difficult for me to fully express my passion in an interview setting. I am passionate about the prospect of being an advisor, and my mind tends to project that the people I am speaking with will see this passion even if I am not explicitly stating it. However, as my life coach likes to point out, people are not mind readers. There is tremendous value in intentional communication. I have seen that in all aspects of life, whether it is professional or personal. Anyhow, I was disappointed to see that the position had been re-posted. This has actually happened numerous times. I am not losing all hope though. I want this position too badly for that. I am going to send an intentional follow up email checking on the status of the position.
The other application that I have spent a significant amount of time on, is a content writing position with a travel agency. As previously mentioned, this was a relatively short application that focused on providing the company with brief writing samples. I should hear back later this week regarding whether or not I am under further consideration for that position. I am passionate about writing, travel, and developing friendships. I have been on a similar trip to the ones organized by this company, and know what an amazing experience it can be. That is why I am interested in the position.
There has also been something else weighing on my mind. I noticed that I had not really discussed the prospects of permanently leaving my PhD program with my parents. I finally had that discussion, for the most part anyway. It went reasonably well, but that was still a moment of heightened anxiety for me and it took a lot of mental energy. This subject could likely be a post of its own. For now, I’ll just say that it is still an area where I struggle with avoidance.
In all, finding the right career path is at the top of my mind right now. It is a critical domino that must fall into place. Once this falls into place, I will be able to increase my focus on social skills, relationships, and hobby development. I know that this was a scattershot post, but that is reflective of how my mind has been operating. There are a lot of moving pieces, and at the moment I am working to resolve that.
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